This one for my brothers

I love you and miss you guys.

Mortified

I was out shopping for chocolate this afternoon and heard my name called. "Nadine?" I turned to see Darren (Ahhh). You know Darren he's the tall, blond and handsome guy that lived down the road in your middle teens and you talked to him sometimes but not in a flirty way. Just friends. But if....Ahhh.

He works at the chocolate factory, has a couple of kids and he's still so nice (read tall,blond and handsome). We talked but not in a flirty way and he really is still nice. He donated some chocolates to my sunday school class. They are going to LOVE my lesson on Sunday.

I made my purchases and walked to the car. As I walked across the carpark my brain started working again and I nearly died. I had no makeup on and my pony tail was not the flattering type, Urgh. As I drove away I took care of my misery

with a little bit of chocolate

Yay Me!!!!

I AM ACCEPTABLE

I AM GOING TO BE A TEACHER

I AM GOING TO WORK VERY HARD

I AM GOING TO BE VERY POOR

THEN I AM GOING TO BE NOT SO POOR

and best of all

I AM GOING TO BE HAPPY

I had it together

for all of 5 minutes this morning. Then the black hole of forgetfulness decended on our hearth and home. Somehow we forgot - Zac had a student free day - To drop Poppy off for a play day with Olivia - To get suitable clothing for a funeral - To call kindy to say Gus wouldn't be there today - To tell wife about the funeral.

To this end we would like to thank everyone who helped to salvage our day of forgetfulness.



THANK YOU

Extra, extra! Blog all about it!

Last days

The last days of winter have passed

Now we lie in wait of heady summer days

A real date

I went on a date with the kind of guy that every woman swears she wants to date. We is funny, and not just a little bit younger than I.

dinner and a movie

He's so progressive he didn't even mind that I payed for the whole shebang.

I rekon I'll ask him out again. His kisses are to die for.

A real baby

Poppy has a new pram and as we are want to do we (the adults) were playing and we thought that putting the real baby in the toy pram would be hilarious. We were so right



Xander was very quickly over the game and returned to Ingrid. This was not okay with Poppy. She threw her dolly which we had tried to replace in the dolls pram and further indicated that it would only be Xander who would be invited to stroll with her this day. Nothing but the real deal would do.

So Nifty

"I want that one."
-Little Britain-

The wind in my hair the road at my feet, for the love of the ride. I talk about getting a motorbike/scooter yet must confess to having never driven one until just now. The other day I succumbed to the will of the mob and took my first baby steps on this scooter. It was too good of an opportunity miss and so I took my first drive of a 50cc bike while the crowd cheered me on.

Craig instructed. I nodded. Then jumped on and prayed.

"Seriously Dee you can ride a bike. You will not just tip over. Okay? You can do this."

Slow acceleration down the long driveway. I feel each 360 degrees of the turning circle tick past as I go for the return trip.It's the longest 100 metres in history. Time slows. I'm outside looking on myself. "You're doing it. See? Don't hunch. They're all watching you. That's right sit up straight. You're nearly there." I'm back with myself and I feel the biggest grin creep and spread across my face. I could ride all day.

10 things I love about Gus

The way he talks.

How much he loves me,

Then how much he doesn't.

His enthusiasm for simple things.

His love of the outdoors.

The way he plays imaginary games.

How much he loves my cooking,

Then how much he doesn't.

His enthusiasm for new things.

His love for chocolate.

What makes you

the meanest Mum?

I am the meanest Mum because I have decreed that ice cream will not be included on the breakfast menu.

TWO WHOLE WEEKS!!!

Hang up your uniform

Time to go out and play

You know you're tired

When you tell Master 5 to go get his pyjamas on and he says he would rather wear his school clothes to bed. You question why and he says it wont take so long to get ready for school the when he wakes up. Hence (not his word) there will be more time for playing cars.

You know it must be 3/4 through the school year and close to the end of term because you can see his logic and you agreee.

Good night.

Cheeky Chops

I could play 'NO' with you all day. Your promise of affection exquisitly with drawn at the last second 'NO'.

You know you love me. I know you love me.

Like a TIGERRRRR

It's a jungle out there and these guys are ready to face it head on. I am impressed daily by their fierceness.

And I often feel so overcome with their tenacity that I laugh. I smother fits of giggles when Gus uses his hurt and angry voice to tell me that he loves me "this much" as he holds up two fist, no fingers, because it was only ten minutes earlier and will be ten minutes until he tells me he loves me "this much" as he holds up two fists, ten fingers. All I can do is tell him that my love for him does not waver. It is given to him with all of my heart and with all of my soul.

Words and pictures

I am often close to tears of late and many times these gems tumble onto my cheek to be gathered up as quietly as they fell. My hormones have been paroled. After being told what to do and when to do it for over two years, effectively incarcerated, they have been given the keys to my body and told the boss wont be coming back.
The following are three examples of my feelings all vying for my attention. So desperate to show me how INTENSELY they feel.
The other night I watched a regular beach life saving show and was pretty confident in passing the evening blithely observing life saving techniques maybe even a near death experience mixed with some tourist who just didn't appreciate the dangers lurking in the shallows. Instead I was sobbing by the first ad break over children and a pregnant woman who had been stung by Blue Bottle jelly fish. I pulled myself together during the break and when they returned so did the tears because NOW a father and son were caught in a rip and the father was holding the child up (just wait I've got to get the tissues) at his own risk. They were saved but not until AFTER the next ad break. I cheered as the stepfather held his sons hand safely on the beach.
Today I caught a tear as it fell over the precipice while I read a lovingly compiled record of my Nana and Papa's early history. I saw a picture of my Nana (hold on more tissues please) as I remember her, beautiful, modern and gentle. I was sad that she has passed but so happy that records had been gathered many years before. I don't know how to express appreciation to Rita for the manuscript.
This evening I read of a reunion between mother and son that was so unique it moved me to tears (again). The mother waited months patiently and devotedly for her young son to recognise her as she had been in a horrible accident. The moment came and she has been rewarded for her efforts.
In all of these moments I thought of my relationships with my family. I thought of the love and determination it would take to save the lives of my children. I thought of how I want to live an honourable life so that some one will want to read about me with pride to have me as their Nana. I thought of the mini reunion I have with my children each day as I return home from work and how happy I am that they are so happy to see me (damn ran out of tissues. Now using pyjama sleeve.).
I'm so glad that I have free and unshackled hormones once again. These feelings are HUGE and WONDERFUL. Birth control be damned I don't think you and I should meet again. I love being free at last.
The final tear should actually be shed for the fact that I didn't even know I didn't feel this way for two years.

Something I like to do

Thanks to Createwings and Holliwood found at Oscraps.com

In this moment

My life is perfect. I have a great sense of peace and well being that is contrary to any financial or image related issues that may be circulating my consciousness. They are mere annoyances that cast no shadow over my plain of contentment. My children are well. Big Daddy and I are gainfully employed and I have hope for further study that will improve our financial constrains. My blessings are abundant. I can not conceive words to express the magnitude of my gratitude. My inability to appropriately thank my Father in Heaven is formidable. I am free. I am in love. I am loved. I am love.

Other family members appear to be happy too. Kristie is getting a new lounge and Ewan is getting something really cool too. Ingrid and Neil are about to have a baby. Brenton has arrived safely in Darwin. Kent is to be married. Mum has finished class reports and Amy gets the T.V. remote just about every night.
I feel safe. I feel peace. My heart is full.

(Is that better girls?)

Funny bones

I was just having a discussion with my Mum yesterday about how some things just aren't as funny as originally thought if you don't watch it with someone who also thinks it's funny. But then tonight I have discovered that somethings can be sooo funny even if you are by yourself. Wow, this site has had me laughing all night. Not exagerating. I've been there since 8pm this evening and I have been laughing so hard I've cried. The commentry is clever and the pictures...well it's too hard for me to describe such hilarity. Check it out. But be warned if you haven't been here before put the kids to bed and promise yourself you'll do the dishes first thing in the morning because noone can look away from a car wreck.

When Mum says "Maybe" does she mean yes, no or maybe?

Thanks to Createwings on Oscraps for the digital scrap elements and papers.

Zac had another friend over on Friday night. Again the boys played with toys and Wii after dinner. Then in parting more plans were made for the school holidays and a "We'll see" with regards to sleep overs.

Do I ask too much?

I miss my guys when I go to work. I don't admit it, ever. But now you know.




Today Zac stayed home because he had the sort of cough that teachers tut at and say to each other "He should be at home." He wasn't disappointed to hang out with The Sibs and play all day. But when Big Daddy came home this morning I could easily see he was going to need sleep so a plan was hatched to put Zac in charge.

Not in charge of everything. Just food, who gets it and when. I made everything up and put it all in individually named zip lock bags. Then drew signs to tell Zac what time he should feed himself and The Sibs.




He did pretty well. He assured me of the following, he only gave everyone their drinks early because they were all thirsty, next time I should not give him fruit because he only eats that at school and next time he needs Gus to help, "This job is too big for just one man."

He's probably right.

And next time I'll set an alarm because a little bit into the morning Mick asked Zac what the time was and Zac came back "the big hand is on the 6 and the little hand is on the 10". Mick asked him if he should get the sultanas his reply was in the negative, because it was obvious to him that the clock did not match the one on the sign.

Next time...

Is it incestuous if it's just pretend?

You can't play mummy's and daddy's with your brothers but some how all that weirdness goes away when you are playing with your cousin. Then your cousin becomes your husband and your brothers become your sons and you can boss them all about till they realise your rules aren't all fun and games. It's starts to feel a lot more like work than play. Then you hear "Come on lets go play with the cars." Game over.


Cousins and sleep overs are just about the funnest things ever invented.


I was the lucky one who got to watch 5 glorious bodies tucked into 4 sleeping bags laying on 3 single beds cushioned on 2 pillows per bed together for just 1 night.

and sometimes we cook.

THEY'LL DO ANYTHING

to get out of work.

Even go to sleep in the middle of the day.

Mick and I asked them to each put ten toys away. They suddenly got a bad case of exhaustion. We called their bluff and told them if they were so tired they should go to bed. They meekly got up from the couch and went to their room were they turned on their night time music and fixed the blanket over them. I could hear them talking for a bit and I thought they would play in bed for a bit and then come out at which time I would reinforce the work rule. They never came out of their room. I checked on them 20 mins later and they had gone to sleep. I looked at Poppy and decided she looked a bit tired too. After a stern talking too she decided she was tired too and thus I had 2 hours of peace and quiet on a Saturday afternoon.

Bromance

So Zac and James are the only LDS kids in their year at Modbury Nth. James just happens to be the son of a bishop. And the two boys haven't always seen eye to eye but this year James' Mum has been doing our family a great service and three days a week she comes to pick up Zac and so since they have been going to school together they have been going to school together. This has resulted in an arrangement of friendship that suits both Heather (James' Mum) and myself.
This week I embraced this arrangment and made an arrangment of my own. I invited James over for dinner and a play. This is the first time a friend has been invited to play at our house with out bringing back up from other family or friends. The best part of the two hour visit wasn't the bit where they sat at the table and used their hot dog buns for comic relief or even when they played Wii without tears or tantrums. I think the best bit was when James walked in the door and Zac ran up and hugged him.
They just might love each other yet.

We love

to dance

till we

DROP

Take it or leave it

This is me. I don't usually get in front of the camera these days. In 6 yrs I've put on 10kg. Yet incredibly in those years I have been pregnant 3 times and during each pregnancy I gained no weight nor lost any. Then during the short periods in which I breast fed I lost a couple of kilos.

So by my amateur calculations I had 36 months in which to gain weight. That is 10 kilos in 3 years.

Here's to losing 10 kilos in the next 3 years.

"Do you think anyone will recognise me?"

Last FridayThe next day.

Mum posted on the Smylie site! Comment there.

WEDDING BELLS ARE GOING TO CHIME

Welcome to the family Callie.

Kent and Callie have decided to get married everybody.

Hooray!!

They called the family during the week to let us all know the news. They don't know for sure when or where but possibly in July 2010 and could be in Darwin where her family are or in Queensland where they live themselves.

We reckon either place is a great holiday destination so roll on wedding. But do we drive or fly thats the question of the moment for us.
A baby for Ingrid and Neil in August and a wedding possibly in July 2010. What an exciting year this is going to be for the Grobins family.

Keep posted for future news love Shelley.

The best bits

By the Grace of God

How do I choose? How do I change?

At the dawn of day I look to my crystal ball I see that woman who gets angry. She smacks them all soundly then puts them to bed. I think she's a bit mean and I don't like her very much.

I want to see the pretty Mum. She's the one who tousels her son's hair as he does his homework while she watches the baby play. She makes a nutritious meal that will be eaten by all, happy to be together and sharing their feelings.

Nah, she looks a bit ridiculous besides her husband's probably having an affair.

I'll settle for family prayer.

You don't have to be kneeling, just there.

It's good to be a grown up

I wrote a whole post just now and by the end of it realized that I had written a journal entry rather than a blog post. So I made it a journal entry and before I lost momentum I started the post all over again.

But I stand by my title.

I love that I'm not at school anymore. I think it's great that somewhere after I turned 18 I realised that I didn't have to be friends with other people my age. I found that I have things in common with people older or younger than me. I have equals who do not fit my demographic. I have respect from people who are both younger and older than me. This respect is based on their observations of and conversation with me. I don't feel constrained by a stereotype or image. I am a member of a massive club. We are The Grown Ups. We can do what ever we want to do. So if you are not a grown up yet hold on you will be one day soon. Then you too can stay up as late as you want to and eat a whole packet of lollies while you play on the computer because you bought them with your own money. Sure there are consequences but don't let them deter you from your chosen path. We can handle them because we are

The Grown Ups.

1001

Poppy stuck her tongue out today. I came home and she was standing in the foyer looking adorable with her tongue deliberately protuding beyond her rose coloured lips. Mick hadn't seem her do it yet. She had saved this cool new trick for when I got home. Obviously assuaging her guilt from when she had learnt to blow rasberries while I was at work and by the time I got home had forgotten how to do it.

Today she was making ammends. Then I spent the next 3 hours poking my tongue out at her and laughing encourgingly when she did the same. I began to wonder if I was teaching her a useful life skill. I then began to ponder how long would it be until I tell her off for sticking her tongue out.

Has anybody done a study on when "it's" not cute anymore? Is there a number when the magic disappears or does it slowly fade until you can't remember when it was cute? In lue of answers I'll just enjoy the magic while it lasts. Maybe if I hold on tight enough the magic will never go away.

On the other hand...

Left: I loved going to Uni. It took me a couple hours journey every day to learn amazing things. I could make my student pension go a mile. I loved buying new shoes I would wear them to go out clubbing. I loved the beat and trying out my newest moves. I loved to dress up and steal a sexy glance or two. I loved to flirt. Back then I would transform between the hours of 9pm and 10pm as I got ready to prowl. The girls and I would play hard and long and leave them dead in our wake. We'd go home, alone, recharge for another week learning and sleeping. Just to play again.

Right: I am never alone. I am completely responsible and I have more money than I have ever had before yet it has been a year since I have bought new shoes, for myself. I love that I have company and someone to share any variety of moment I could possibly come across. I love to be taught about learning everyday. I'm learning about cause and effect, good and bad, age of choice, questions and answers, coping mechanisms and most of all the limits of human endurance.

Zac asks questions that make me have to use all the knowledge I thought was useless. Gus...so funny. And Poppy is quick and smart and gets what she wants by any means necessary.

My relationships are more solid. Sure they don't glitter and sparkle and give you butterflies in your stomach. Now it's a feeling that is stuck like super glue. I nurture, I nourish and a lot of people need me.

Every now and then I lament my lost youth. I dance and I just don't move like I used to, and even if I did it would just look sad. I wish...

And then I know that I wouldn't trade what I have for any random pash or long distance relationship. Mick laughs when I try to have a make out session. He makes me come back into a room just to tell me he loves me, especially when I'm running late. I know what he's thinking, I know what he needs and I know that he wants me.

These things just happen

I sent my son to school today,

He came home with a friend,

I can cross that off my worry list,

That puts nutrition at the top.

I sent my son to school today,

He came home without a note,

To tell me of some naughty prank,

He must have been real good.

I sent my son to school today,

I can't believe he's five,

He reads his book and ties his shoes,

And buttons up his shirts.

I sent my son to school today,

I'll send him back tomorrow,

They'll fill his head with useless stuff,

He'll never need to use.

I wanted to go to school today,

I wanted to make him safe,

I think that I have done my best,

I had to let him go.

Hottest 100(ish)

Help me finish my Australia Day list I'm 20 shy of a full packet.

1 Tim Tams

2 Tim Tam slams
3 Cadbury Chocolate
4 Haighs Chocolate
5 Vegemite on toast
6 Magnums
7 Lamingtons
8 Darrell Lea Licorice
9 Bundaberg Ginger Beer
10 Roy and HG
11 The Umbilical Brothers
12 Adam Hills
13 Wil Anderson
14 Fiona O'Loughlin
15 Cate Blanchet
16 Geoffrey Rush
17 Anne Geddes
18 Megan Gale
19 Australian Tennis Open
20 Aussie Rules Football
21 The Wallabies
22 Adelaide United
23 Clipsal 500
24 Tour Down Under
25 Australia Day
26 ANZAC Day
27 Cup days
28 6 weeks school holiday at Christmas
29 Pool parties for Christmas
30 Mall's Balls
31 The Big Banana
32 Sydney Opera House
33 Harbour Bridge
34 Mt Lofty

35 Glenelg Beach

36 Bondi Beach
37 St Kilda Beach
38 Fanny Bay
39 Gold Coast
40 The Great Barrier Reef
41 The Blue Mountains
42 The Outback
43 The Bush
44 The Back of Beyond
45 The Great Ocean Road
46 Ayers Rock
47 Margaret River

48 The Barossa

49 The Coorong
50 The Great Australian Bight
51 Trackies
52 Battlers
53 Muffin Tops
54 Speedo
55 Sass & Bide
56 Thongs
57 Ugg Boots

58 Zinc Cream
59 Rove
60 Kath and Kim
61 Neighbours
62 Ned Kelly
63 Dawn Frasier
64 Allan Davis
65 Mem Fox
66 Princess Mary
67 Miles Franklin
68 Henry Lawson

69 Dame Edna
70 Wollemi Pine
71 Sturt Desert Pea
72 Yellow Wattle
73 Roos
74 Emus
75 Tasmanian Devil
76 Frilled Neck Lizard
77 Powder finger
78 Spiderbait
79 Sarah Blasko
80 The Herd
81 John Butler Trio
82 Kate Miller-Heidke
83 Casey Stoner
84 Matt Hayden
85 Simon Baker
FROM KRISTIE
86 V8 Commodore
87 The Wiggles
88 Paspaley Pearls
89 Qantas
90 Bonds
91 Triple J
92 Coopers
93 K-Rudd

FROM ARIANA
94 Ian Thorpe

FROM SHARON
95 Fairy Bread
96 Chico Rolls
97 Musk Lifesavers


FROM IRISH
98 Crocs
99 Classic Chocolate Milk
100 Fru Chocs

Thanks girls